The Romance of Financial Independence

This is a hill I am willing to die on:

As a woman, being financially independent from your partner is the most romantic thing you can do.

You see, in conversations around the subject of women, careers and salaries, I often hear explicit or implied concerns around what the woman’s financial independence will do to the relationship. Both men AND women seem to think that diverging from the traditional path of man-makes-bank-woman-takes-care-of-babies-and-cave, will harm their relationship.

My perspective is wholly different, and it’s based on personal experience and a large number of conversations with clients and other people.

If you don’t HAVE to be with your partner, but you CHOOSE to be – every single day – that’s a much more solid basis for a loving relationship than needing to stay with someone because you couldn’t sustain your lifestyle without them.

Women in particular, listen to me here: your financial independence creates a healthy basis for a loving relationship. Yet another reason to make sure you have a great career + salary, don’t you think? #takeyourselfseriously

Men in heterosexual relationships, I’m going to give it to you straight: if your partner’s financial independence threatens you, look deep, deep inside yourself and ask yourself why that is and what you’re afraid of losing. (And probably step it the f*ck up in the areas you’re currently not quite providing in – just sayin.)

Say it with me team: financial independence is #hotashell.

Next week: why negotiating at the kitchen table leads to better sex #itssciencebaby